what depression feels like Lyrics

This bed that was once for sleep has become a prison

This feeling whispers to me, so of course, I listen to it

Because I don't know myself anymore

I don't want to open that door

I know they're waiting, they're knocking, they're there to listen

But what if they aren't

What if instead I'm greeted by the prodding of hot irons

Wide smiles hiding guilty liars

So I lay back down and spend hours scrolling on my phone

Wondering if I'll ever be able to fully live alone

And my coffee doesn't taste right, take some pills to help my brain

Have a 7 hour self hate sesh, go to the arcade

I don't want to go to therapy, I swear I'm feeling fine

But I'll listen to my friends rant, that's how I spend most of my time

Mental headspace gone, I still fill it up with words

Pinch myself to stay awake, and like it when it hurts

I can't move (move, move, move)

I can't feel (feel, feel, feel)

I can't prove (prove, prove)

What is real (what is real, what is real, what is real)

I feel like a magnet of despair that's been pulled down too strong

I feel like I've got a million tons of weight from my mistakes on my shoulders

I feel like I've been crushed by rocks, not pebbles, but boulders

It's almost like I'm falling in reverse, but reverse is worse

Because I'm losing my progress

I don't want to bother them again

They helped me the first time, when I was a lesser friend

So I can do this on my own, right

Wrong (wrong, wrong, wrong)

I'm empty (empty, empty, empty)

I'm selfish (selfish)

I'm lost

I'm breaking

I'm sinking (sinking)

Lower (lower)

Until one day

It all just stops